Ramadan Parenting Challenge Day 19: Don't Envy. Be Appreciative.

Ramadan Parenting Challenge 2014

Prophet Muhammad (s) once came out and offered the funeral prayer for the martyrs of Uhud, and proceeded to the pulpit and said, “…By Allah, I am not afraid that you will worship others along with Allah, but I am afraid that you will envy and fight one another for worldly fortunes.” (Narrated 'Uqba bin 'Amr in Bukhari 56:795)

How right he (s) was to fear it for us because when you look around yourself now what do you see but Muslims envying one another and fighting to have bigger and better houses, fancier cars and generally amassing worldly fortunes. How many times have fathers seen their friend’s son’s success and wished their own son could do better? How many times have mothers been to weddings and wished that their daughter’s wedding would be more extravagant? How many times have you went to someone’s house and saw their brand new large screen TV and wished that you had one even bigger?

Prophet Muhammad (s) had admonished us to not be envious of one another (Muslim) except to someone who spends in Allah’s cause and someone with more knowledge and uses it wisely. Allah's Messenger (s) said: “There should be no envy except in the case of two: A man whom Allah gives wealth, so he is able to spend it on the truth, and a man whom Allah gives wisdom so he judges and teaches with it.” (Narrated by Ibn Masud in Bukhari 24:490)

Humans are weak and occasionally we do fall into envy when someone has more or better than us. But when this happens you must remember that whatever you have in your possession, whether minimal or in abundance, is a test. Allah says: Your wealth and your children are only a trial, whereas Allah! With Him is a great reward (Paradise). (Qur’an 64:15)

So be accepting of the things that you have and say “Alhamdulillah,” and know that the successful one is he who is granted Paradise. Allah says: Beautified for men is the love of things they covet; women, children, much of gold and silver (wealth), branded beautiful horses, cattle and well-tilled land. This is the pleasure of the present world's life; but Allah has the excellent return (Paradise with flowing rivers) with Him. (Qur’an 3:14)

When you strive for Allah the question is no longer, how can I get more wealth and possessions but now becomes, how do I gain Paradise? The answer is simply, by Allah’s Mercy and obeying Him and doing as many good deeds as you can.

On the other side of the coin, you might possess things that others envy so you would need to protect yourself. Seek refuge with Allah and read the last three surahs of the Qur’an, specifically, surah al-Falaq and an-Naas relates to envy. Where children are concerned, you should recite the following dua but in Arabic: Narrated Ibn 'Abbas: The Prophet used to seek Refuge with Allah for Al-Hasan and Al-Husain and say: “Your forefather (i.e. Ibrahim) used to seek Refuge with Allah for Ismail and Ishaq by reciting the following: ‘O Allah! I seek Refuge with Your Perfect Words from every devil and from poisonous pests and from every evil, harmful, envious eye.’”  (Bukhari 55:590)

Challenge for today is to:

1. Not be envious.
2. Accept what Allah has given you and say “Alhamdulillah.”
3. Strive to beat others in good deeds not worldly possessions.
4. Learn the dua for protecting your children from other’s envy.

Do these and continue to do them throughout Ramadan.